Bodies

Today, Kendal took me to the Bodies Exhibit in downtown Indy as a post-birthday present. So cool. The scientist in me was thoroughly fascinated. Textbooks just don't give human anatomy justice. My favorite parts of the exhibit were the full body displays that are in all different poses and showing skeletal structure, muscles, and/or internal organs. The circulatory system room was also pretty cool--they were able to preserve blood vessels in an arm and leg and get rid of everything else. Creepiest part: The display of human skin (looks like leather) This exhibit gives you a little closer look at God's creation... amazing. Check it out: Bodies Exhibit

Remembering

I forget things... a lot more often than I think. I realized recently that the great thing about forgetting is remembering. Take autumn, for example. On any given day, if you asked me what my favorite season is I'd probably say spring or summer. Autumn would take 3rd place, only because the gloomy gray days of winter last far too long in my opinion. But every year October takes me by surprise. The leaves changing into gorgeous colors, the cooler air replacing the heat of summer. I really do love it.

The same thing happens when I come home. Home-home (as opposed to Bloomington-home.) Sometimes I forget how much I enjoy the quiet of the country, or the smell of my grandma's house, or being teased by my brother and cousin. But when I remember... it makes me smile, like I'm rediscovering it again for the first time.

Yet another example at the library last week--I checked out some Emerson. I forgot how much I like poetry. Here's a taste:

The Rhodora
(RW Emerson)

On being asked, whence is the flower.

In May, when sea-winds pierced our solitudes,

I found the fresh Rhodora in the woods,

Spreading its leafless blooms in a damp nook,

To please the desert and the sluggish brook.

The purple petals fallen in the pool

Made the black water with their beauty gay;

Here might the red-bird come his plumes to cool,

And court the flower that cheapens his array.

Rhodora! if the sages ask thee why

This charm is wasted on the earth and sky,

Tell them, dear, that, if eyes were made for seeing,

Then beauty is its own excuse for Being;

Why thou wert there, O rival of the rose!

I never thought to ask; I never knew;

But in my simple ignorance suppose

The self-same power that brought me there, brought you.

Planes, trains, and automobiles

It will only take me 2 hours to drive home tomorrow to be with my family.

My aunt, uncle, and cousins will drive across 4 states (~12 hrs) to be here for Christmas.

Melissa and I had dinner (and donuts!) tonight, thanks to her quick flight from Massachusetts.

If it were not for air travel, odds are I wouldn't know and enjoy the company of Doug, Miriam, Joni, Payel, Krithika, Ying, Rohini, Rich, or Vasanthi. (This list could be extended :) )

My life is richer for the people listed above, among many others. Without innovative transportation, we may not have crossed paths, or at least not as often. Thanks to God for the blessings of the people in my life and the means that brought us together.

(Let's overlook the contribution planes, trains, and cars make to global warming for the sake of this post...)

Stop trying to clean the house and open the door

Last night as I was trying to figure out what to do with my new-found free time (obviously the internet won out over the overwhelming pile of dishes in the sink) I ran across the Stuff Christians Like blog. I've read snippets of it before and enjoyed it, but I really liked his post yesterday. Take a look: #458 Fixing our motives.

I totally do this more often than I'd like to think--try to fix things on my own before coming to God. Let's take a moment (or a lot longer) to be thankful that we can't fix ourselves, but God can and is just waiting on us to open the door and let him in.

EDIT: Right after I wrote this, it hit me that it also ties in with the Mary and Martha dilemma (Luke 10:38-42). Food for thought.

The importance of being stupid

This is a slight detour from the "thankfulness" posts, to expand on the stupidity/grad school post from yesterday. Maybe I should clarify a few things. (Hopefully this will make you feel better about it, Nicole!)

First, I think the "Impostor syndrome" is most common with in the sciences, specifically those involving a laboratory research component. Not that it doesn't happen in other programs, but it seems to be a consistent trend when you're trying to figure out how to ask meaningful questions about biological systems and then how to go about answering them.

Second, feeling stupid is a good thing! Hard to deal with at times, but good. I like this quote from Winston Churchill: "Personally I'm always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught." For me, I think its a pride issue. It still creeps up often, but now that I know what it is, I'm better able to combat it. It's a challenge to be comfortable with feeling stupid and going beyond that, to be comfortable enough to ask the questions you're thinking regardless of if you think they're stupid or not.

There was an editorial in the Journal of Cell Science last spring entitled "The importance of stupidity in scientific research." (Schwartz, 2008) Here are a few excerpts from it (emphasis added).

Second, we don’t do a good enough job of teaching our students
how to be productively stupid – that is, if we don’t feel stupid it
means we’re not really trying. I’m not talking about ‘relative
stupidity’, in which the other students in the class actually read
the material, think about it and ace the exam, whereas you don’t.
I’m also not talking about bright people who might be working
in areas that don’t match their talents. Science involves confronting
our ‘absolute stupidity’. That kind of stupidity is an existential
fact, inherent in our efforts to push our way into the unknown.
...
Productive stupidity means being ignorant by choice. Focusing
on important questions puts us in the awkward position of being
ignorant. One of the beautiful things about science is that it allows
us to bumble along, getting it wrong time after time, and feel
perfectly fine as long as we learn something each time. No doubt,
this can be difficult for students who are accustomed to getting the
answers right. No doubt, reasonable levels of confidence and
emotional resilience help, but I think scientific education might do
more to ease what is a very big transition: from learning what other
people once discovered to making your own discoveries. The more
comfortable we become with being stupid, the deeper we will wade
into the unknown and the more likely we are to make big
discoveries.

------------------------------------------------------------------
Schwartz, M. A. (2008). "The importance of stupidity in scientific research." Journal of Cell Science 121: 1771.

First semester down

I cannot even begin to tell you how extremely thankful I am that my biochemistry class is OVER! I took the last exam tonight; it wasn't the worst one, and it wasn't fantastic, but it's over. This was by far the hardest class I have ever taken. I've never had grades this low (luckily the whole class has grades similar to mine and there's a rather nice curve.) I actually like biochemistry, but this class... well, this class is notorious for making students hate it.

This past semester of grad school has been one of the most humbling experiences. Grad school makes you feel stupid. That's its job. You're supposed to feel stupid. Every day. They even have a lady from CAPS come in and talk to us at the beginning of the semester about Impostor Syndrome--when you begin to feel like you're not smart enough for this and that they must have admitted you by mistake--no joke, there's an actual name for it. I knew this coming into grad school; one of my closest coworkers in my old lab warned me about it and told me to not let it get to me--that it happens to everybody and the sooner you all admit to each other that you feel stupid, the sooner you can bond over it. (So true, I'm also thankful for the other Micro/MBG ladies who are all pretty awesome.) So here it is, one semester of feeling stupid down. I'm thankful I made it through with some pretty good friends, a great research project lined up, a passing biochem grade, and some measure of sanity.

Today's praise

ECC's Christmas Cantata. Adorable kids, extremely talented musicians, and the vocal stylings of Chelsea and Christina--all praising God. Enough Said.

There is no frigate like a book...

I was one of those kids who always had her nose stuck in a book--on the school bus, in the car, at recess. I love books. The stories, the characters, problems, resolutions, relationships--I can get lost in it all. I'm thankful for the printing press and the fact that books of all sorts are all readily available at the nearest library or bookstore. Not to mention the fact that we have the privilege of having God's Word in print to read and study for ourselves.

Lately, I've only been able to read science journal articles (aside from a couple weeks ago when I managed to make it through the first 20 pages of Pride and Prejudice before falling asleep on the couch.) Christmas break is prime time to read to my heart's desire, but I need suggestions! I'm game for just about anything: fiction, non-fiction, history, biography, poetry... So if you have any ideas I would be happy to hear them. :)

There is no frigate like a book
To take us lands away,
Nor any coursers like a page
Of prancing poetry.
This traverse may the poorest take
Without oppress of toll;
How frugal is the chariot
That bears a human soul!
-Emily Dickinson

Spirit-filled

Every once in awhile at Cgroup and Yellow House I wonder how so many uniquely awesome people can end up in the same room at the same time. Then the Holy Spirit taps me on the shoulder (or whacks me upside the head, depending on what the situation calls for) and reminds me that it's all due to Him living inside these people. Praise God for the gift of his Spirit living in us.

Spirit filled souls are ablaze for God. They love with a love that glows. They serve with a faith that kindles. They serve with a devotion that consumes. They hate sin with fierceness that burns. They rejoice with a joy that radiates. Love is perfected in the fire of God. --Samuel Chadwick

Science humor

A little more on the light-hearted side of things: I appreciate scientists, their senses of humor, and their unashamed delight in studying the world.

Example 1: Science meets MTV. An actual advertisement for a polymerase chain reaction (PCR) machine, We-Are-the-World style.



Example 2: My birthday "cake" from friends.

The 'rents

I honestly don't know how I ended up with such a great family. Really. Huge blessing. It was wonderful having my parents in town visiting today and just being able to spend time with them. I appreciate them so much more now that I've been (relatively) on my own for a handful of years. I know there's no way I'd be the same person without their guidance, support, and love. And I know that God used them as more than just loving support and a moral standard. They made sure that I was at church, Sunday school, and youth group every Sunday--in a way, He used them to bring me to Him--and for that I will be eternally grateful (literally).

As for my mom, I appreciate the fact that she always has a listening ear. When she asks how you are, she cares about the answer. She's also been my shoulder to cry on for more than one occasion, everything from skinned up knees to a broken heart. A hug from mom has gotten me through many rough days. Her family is top of the list. I don't think I can even grasp all the things that she has done for Chad and I throughout the last 23 years. Chauffeuring us to innumerable practices and performances, sitting through all of our band concerts, sports events, and academic competitions (even though those are insanely boring), making sure that homework was taken care of, chaperoning the elementary fieldtrips, being team mom and room mother, making who knows how many lunches and baked goods for school events--and that's just for starters. Her hospitality is unmatched in my book. She always goes above and beyond. I could keep going, but that would take more than one blog post. :)

As for my dad, he's the hardworking perfectionist of our family. He doesn't just scrape by on a project, he puts the time in to get it right. When I came home in 4th grade and told him that I wanted to show sheep, he was all for it and went out of his way to talk to local sheep farmers and read books (which is not his favorite pastime) so that he knew what to do. My quiet side is from my dad. He may not be super talkative but when he talks, you listen. I can list off my favorite times with my dad; they aren't anything spectacular--just times when we spent quality time together. Bike rides after dinner (and picking weeds/flowers to give to mom), trips to get grape slushies, afternoons around the barns, sheep show days, him teaching me things even when I didn't want to learn. I remember at sheep shows there were friends whose dads would get frustrated when they didn't get something right, but my dad was always so patient with me. It didn't matter if I won or if I answered the judge's questions correctly or if I made a mistake in the ring. My dad was more concerned that I tried my best and learned from my mistakes. Oh, and hugs from dad are top notch too--always make me feel safe and loved beyond what I can comprehend.

I love my parents dearly. I am so grateful that God placed me in this family.

Snow

I'm grateful for snow and the magical touch it adds to a chilly, winter day. There's nothing quite like waking up to a world covered in white with giant snowflakes still slowing floating down from the sky.

(This wasn't quite the view I woke up to this morning, but a parking lot covered in snow isn't quite as pretty to look at :) ; this picture's from a Christmas at home a few years ago.)

K-Herg

Kendal, my roommate and best friend is just awesome. I was thinking last night that I probably take her for granted far too often. So today, I am remembering how extremely thankful I am for her. Where do I even begin? Maybe I should just tell you a few stories...

When my dog died last spring, she was the first to offer a tissue and a hug and let me cry on her shoulder. When I've dealt with break-ups, she sat with me and let me talk through it and then brought me back to reality with words of advice and hope. Loving.

Once 'Build Me Up Buttercup' was playing on one of our computers and we ended up making it a duet. Now it's a typical event around our place. Fun.

We talked once for probably a good half an hour about what could cause cranio-facial duplication. Sciency conversation is never hard to come by around here. Kendal's been sharing stuff with me about her physiology class lately (fyi, don't climb mount everest. The low O2 content is really really bad for your physical and mental health).She got into IU med school and is going to be one heck of a doctor. She's also concerned about healthcare in underpriveleged populations and is working with MiddleWay to develop new policy that will be submitted to the government. Smart.

Last night, neither one of us made it back to the apartment until after 8pm. Kendal had run to Target after her meeting and pulled out a bag of Milanos from the Target sack. She said she purposely got the chocolate raspberry ones because she knows I don't like chocolate mint. Today I had to run home to grab some notes I forgot and she drove me back to campus so that I wouldn't be late for class. Thoughtful.

So yeah, she's pretty great. I'm really really thankful for who she is, her friendship, and the fact that she puts up with me. :) I'm going to miss her next year.

P.S. I'm also thankful for the nice man from Baron Hill's district office that helped me find the room that Kendal's Leadership,Ethics, and Social Action poster presentation was in today.

I like Thursdays

Maybe this thankfulness thing will end up being a daily post... who knows. I'll probably miss days, but 3 in a row isn't bad.

Today I'm thankful for Thursdays. Thursdays mean a delicious cup of tea and a good chat with Erica at the Pourhouse to start my day. Sometimes, like today, I hang around and read my Bible for a bit before heading off to work. On Thursdays, I don't have any classes to teach or take so it's a full day of lab work, which I love. Today I'm going to start my fly work which should be interesting. Tonight I have an AI meeting which is the one downfall of Thursdays, but even that isn't so bad. Jenny and I always end up making the meetings enjoyable, making up lab olympic events (pipette javelin) or making up interesting things to go along with the model organisms (the Manduca dance).

So all in all, Thursdays are pretty awesome, and I'm thankful that today is Thursday. :)

EDIT: I'm also really thankful for Beth and our almost weekly lunches/coffee breaks, which are not exclusive to Thursdays but did occur today. :)

A season of being thankful

So rumor has it that Pastor Bob issued a task last week to be consciously thankful for something/someone everyday this advent season. I was out of town on Sunday and haven't listened to the sermon yet, so I'm going to assume that's similar to what it was. I'm going to try to be specific with my thankfulness and not just cop out with "my family and friends" as per usual.

So yesterday it was the care and consideration of my friends.

Today, I'm thankful for God's grace while teaching, especially when I don't feel adequately prepared to answer questions about population genetics. The lab I teach went well this morning, despite the fact that I didn't feel well prepared for it and I'm no where near an expert on the genetic diversity of the broccoli family. All thanks to God.

Care and consideration

Over the past week or so I've been somewhat overwhelmed (in a good way) by my friends and their consideration for my physical, mental, and spiritual well-being. Today I was reminded of it again.

I ended up with a cold over break. It's definitely not the worst cold I've had, but I ended up staying home from lab for most of yesterday because I was exhausted and not really focusing very well. (Lab work in that state of mind usually ends up in failed experiments and frustration in my experience.) Today, the professor I work with came into the lab and wandered over to my bench. "How're you doing?" he asked. Normally, that's his casual way of asking "How are your experiments coming along and do you have any new results?" So without really looking up I answered "Fine. I have some new pictures to show you," and started to pull the pictures up on my computer. He stopped me by saying, "No. How are YOU?" For some reason, that really touched me that he remembered that I was gone yesterday and took time to ask how I was even though I was ready to jump right into a conversation about work.

Honestly, I don't know why I expect less, but I do. I guess that's why I've been pleasantly overwhelmed lately at the level of caring I've seen from my friends and family. I can see the Spirit in them and I appreciate it more than I can say. It makes me resolve to be that kind of friend back to them.

Sophie

This is the first face that greeted me when I got home on Wednesday afternoon. Meet Sophie, the newest member of the family.

Only 5 cents?

Starbucks Joins RED to Help Save Lives in Africa

Is anyone else slightly annoyed by this? I'm all for businesses teaming up to fight a cause, especially one as worthy as AIDS. But come on Starbucks, only 5 cents out of each of your ridiculously overpriced beverages is going toward the charity?! I think you can probably spare more than that. Or better yet, I'll send my 5 bucks to the Red campaign. They need the money; I don't need the coffee.

A grateful heart

November 25, 2008

Give thanks to the LORD, call on his name;
make known among the nations what he has done.
Sing to him, sing praise to him;
tell of all his wonderful acts.
Glory in his holy name;
let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice.
Look to the LORD and his strength;
seek his face always.
Remember the wonders he has done,
his miracles and the judgments he pronounced.
Psalm 105:1-5

Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD;
let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation.
Let us come before him with thanksgiving
and extol him with music and song.
For the LORD is the great God,
the great king above all gods.
In his hand are the depths of the earth,
and the mountain peaks belong to him.
The sea is his, for he made it,
and his hands formed the dry land.
Come let us kneel before the LORD our Maker;
for he is our God and we are the people of his pasture,
the flock under his care.
Psalm 95:1-7

The latest from the Swem's

November 17, 2008

Is it Christmas yet? I'm aching to see these kids.

I Got the Feelin' (Baby Baby Baby)

Oh, Cosby Show reruns. This one's a classic; makes me smile. Check it out. (Sorry, embedding disabled on this one)

The Huxtables lip sync to James Brown
AKA Theo is awesome

Jenny: "I wish my family did that..."

The YHBS

November 12, 2008

Last night I went to the Yellow House Bible study which I hadn't been able to attend all semester because of a Tuesday night class. What a breath of fresh air! It seriously fed my heart and soul. These women are amazing: smart, funny, loving, confident, beautiful, humble, and truly seeking God. The group is just a mix of wonderful personalities that make me smile. And beyond the individuals, you have the group: a fellowship of women eager to learn about God, trying to follow his will, and finding practical application and relevance in the scripture we study. Last night I was struck with something I think I've taken for granted before--the honesty in this group. I think it really makes the difference. We're all honest with what we're struggling with and trying to apply what we're learning from scripture to our lives. I'm so encouraged knowing that these women are going through issues similar to what I'm going through and looking to God for answers, strength, and love. Love you ladies!

If one falls down,
his friend can help him up.
But pity the man who falls
and has no one to help him up!

Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?

Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Ecclesiastes 4:10-12

Joy in the small things

November 9, 2008

Yet another reason why kids are amazing: they remind me to find joy in the small things and that everyday should be lived with laughter and friends.

Conversation between Nicholas and Zane (both 5 years old)

Nicholas: My name starts with an "N."
Zane: Hey, my name has an "N" in it too!
Nicholas: Really? Cool!

...and later...

Zane: I'm 5 years old.
Nicholas: Me too! Cool!

(Then they looked at me with something akin to pity when I told them that I was not 5 years old. :) )

Interesting snippets from the Inbox

November 5, 2008

#1
To: SiHall
Subj: Unicorn Training
(Apparently this is something to do with protein purification, and not mystical creatures. Disappointment.)


#2
To: AIs
"If you know a good place to find pillbugs & can
bring some in, it would be appreciated."

Overheard at the polls

November 4, 2008

"I wonder how much we spend nationally on those 'I Voted' stickers..."


Hmmm... you never hear politicians talk about cutting spending on patriotic paraphernalia.

Beauty, part IV: Simplicity, Complexity, Majesty

November 2, 2008

The fourth and final installment on beauty. I'm not going to completely explain all my thoughts here; just follow along...

God's beauty: Simplicity, Complexity, Majesty

Simplicity. I wake up in the morning; the sun is beginning to rise. As it does it casts light over the earth. By this light I can see--see to walk, see to read, see other people, see creation, etc. Simple: sun rises, gives light, every day, I use that light to go about my daily routine.

Complexity. "Deep in the sun's core, nuclear fusion reactions convert hydrogen to helium, which generates energy. Particles of light called photons carry this energy through the sun's spherical shell, called the radiative zone, to the top layer of the solar interior, the convection zone. There, boiling motions of gases (like in a lava lamp) transfer the energy to the surface. This journey takes more than a million years. In addition to light, the sun radiates heat and a steady stream of charged particles known as the solar wind." (nationalgeographic.com)

To see, you need light. Light reflects off of objects, into your eyes. The light passes through the cornea and the iris, which will contract or dilate to adjust the amount of light that goes deeper into the eye. The light eventually reaches the retina where it hits the photoreceptors (rods and cones). Signals from the photoreceptors travel along nerve fibers to the optic nerve to the brain where the information is processed and interpreted. (webmd.com) It's a whole lot more complicated than this and it all literally happens in the blink of an eye.

Majesty. Job 26: 7-14
He spreads out the northern skies over empty space;
he suspends the earth over nothing.

He wraps up the waters in his clouds,
yet the clouds do not burst under their weight.

He covers the face of the full moon,
spreading his clouds over it.

He marks out the horizon on the face of the waters
for a boundary between light and darkness.

The pillars of the heavens quake,
aghast at his rebuke.

By his power he churned up the sea;
by his wisdom he cut Rahab to pieces.

By his breath the skies became fair;
his hand pierced the gliding serpent.

And these are but the outer fringe of his works;
how faint the whisper we hear of him!
Who then can understand the thunder of his power?"

God's beauty is far greater than I can comprehend, but I know that I see it or at least glimpses of "the outer fringe of his works". Nature and science are just oozing with God's beauty. From the simplest bacterial cell (which is honestly still pretty complex) to the most complex chemical reaction, God's creativity shines in the range of his creation.

Beauty, part III: When beauty goes bad

November 1, 2008

The past week has been a rollercoaster; good news, bad news, joy, frustration--all rolled into the past 7 days. It's been a bit of a rude awakening. My life is messier than I'd like to let on and or even admit to myself for that matter. The beauty from the Spirit that should be shining through is dampened by my humanity and selfishness.

What causes beauty to go bad? There are daisies that are planted outside of the building that my lab is in. A month ago they were absolutely beautiful, full of bright white and yellow blooms rising up to meet the sunlight. Over the past several weeks they've been deteriorating. Many of the blooms have fallen off their stems, and those that have survived are beginning to wilt and will be taken hostage by the frost soon. Death is what it all comes down to. Nothing on this earth can last forever. All that's living (by worldly standards) is destined for decay and ultimately death. We can even see it in ourselves--my eyesight hasn't been 20/20 since I was 9.

The thing is... as much as pop culture tells us death is natural, it's not. Things were perfect and beautiful until the fall... and then it all went downhill.

By the sweat of your brow
you will eat your food
until you return to the ground
since from it you were taken;
for dust you are
and to dust you will return.
Genesis 3: 19

Man's sin caused a rift between us and God. We sin. We choose our own way over God's. We drive a wedge between us; tell Him that we can do it on our own. By doing this, our connection with God is broken... our connection to life is broken. No life=death. There's no beauty found in sin and death. It's the complete opposite of God and the life he has.

So what causes beauty to go bad?

But each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death. James 1:14-15

And how can it be restored?

For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, 14because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. Romans 8: 13-14

Coming soon... part IV

Beauty, part II: Life

October 29, 2008 (part 2 of 4... I think)

The other night I was with the Yellow House ladies carving pumpkins and watching Halloween movies. Hocus Pocus was playing the background as we sat chatting away, covered in pumpkin guts. At one point, I was struck by a connection between the movie and beauty. I know it sounds strange, but just stay with me; it's not as much of a stretch as it seems.

The basic premise of the movie is that 300+ yr old witches are brought back to life and then must capture the souls of children, dementor-style, in order to stay alive and become young and beautiful again. For them, life and beauty go hand in hand. Death results in deterioration. That's the case for us too. In many cases beauty is directly correlated to life. Nature is one of the most obvious. The spring is one of my favorite seasons (currently in a tight race with fall for first.) Trees begin budding, flowers bloom, and the world just seems to overflow with colors and activity. Thriving with new life, rejuvenated after the bare winter.

This is true for people too. When they're filled with life, beauty just flows out. But where does life come from?

The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you are spirit and they are life. (John 6:63)

God is life. When I see/hear/experience my friends filled with the Spirit, it's beautiful. In particular, I'm thinking about the joyful faces and voices during worship and prayer. The more we are filled with the Spirit, the more we exude life and as a result, beauty.

Beauty, part I: The way it should be

October 28, 2008

Beauty. A general definition: something that brings pleasure or satisfaction. But what does that mean exactly? What pleases us? What satisfies?

As a broad generalization, I think we find beauty in the way things should be. Take a look at the pictures I posted before, paying particular attention to the ones with people. The smiling, joyful faces of my baby cousins. The friendship and support shown between Melissa and Kendal. There's no pain, suffering, sorrow, anger, malice, bitterness, or violence in these pictures. What we do see there is joy, hope, love. Delighted innocence. Loving relationship.

I think this goes for the qualities of Jesus that we can see in other people as well. When we get a glimpse into who God made someone to be, it fills us with pleasure. Think of the beauty that we find in a gentle spirit, a strong yet humble leader, a caring friend.

Stay tuned for part II.

Lessons on Building Friendship and Trust

October 27, 2008

More to come on beauty soon, but I was just reminded of this part of Le Petit Prince this evening and felt the need to share. This may be a children's book but it is filled with wisdom. Oh, and it's better in French too. :)

"Come and play with me," proposed the little prince. "I am so unhappy."

"I cannot play with you," the fox said. "I am not tamed."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

"My life is very monotonous," the fox said. "I hunt chickens; men hunt me. All the chickens are just alike, and all the men are just alike. And, in consequence, I am a little bored. But if you tame me, it will be as if the sun came to shine on my life. I shall know the sound of a step that will be different from all the others. Other steps send me hurrying back underneath the ground. Yours will call me, like music, out of my burrow. And then look: you see the grain-fields down yonder? I do not eat bread. Wheat is of no use to me. The wheat fields have nothing to say to me. And that is sad. But you have hair that is the color of gold. Think how wonderful that will be when you have tamed me! The grain, which is also golden, will bring me back the thought of you. And I shall love to listen to the wind in the wheat..."

The fox gazed at the little prince, for a long time.

"Please — tame me!" he said.

"I want to, very much," the little prince replied. "But I have not much time. I have friends to discover, and a great many things to understand."

"One only understands the things that one tames," said the fox. "Men have no more time to understand anything. They buy things all ready made at the shops. But there is no shop anywhere where one can buy friendship, and so men have no friends any more. If you want a friend, tame me..."

"What must I do, to tame you?" asked the little prince.

"You must be very patient," replied the fox. "First you will sit down at a little distance from me — like that — in the grass. I shall look at you out of the corner of my eye, and you will say nothing. Words are the source of misunderstandings. But you will sit a little closer to me, every day..."

The next day the little prince came back.

"It would have been better to come back at the same hour," said the fox. "If, for example, you come at four o'clock in the afternoon, then at three o'clock I shall begin to be happy. I shall feel happier and happier as the hour advances. At four o'clock, I shall already be worrying and jumping about. I shall show you how happy I am! But if you come at just any time, I shall never know at what hour my heart is to be ready to greet you... One must observe the proper rites..."

-------

So the little prince tamed the fox.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

"Goodbye," said the fox. "And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."

Le Petit Prince (Antoine de Saint-Exupery)

Beauty: Food for thought

October 24, 2008

A few of my favorites. Thoughts to come later.














from the top: fall colors, frosty apple, haley and bobby (7mth?), sunset over campus after a storm, butterfly at the orchard, foggy day at Chateau de Chillion in Switzerland, friendship (Melissa and Kendal), flying over the Alps, metaphase during mitosis

What is beauty?

October 21 2008

I was finishing dinner with Jenny and Mateo last weekend when the conversation topic turned to beauty and our perception of it. At one point, someone asked "But how are we defining beauty?" We sat there with wrinkled foreheads and squinted eyes trying to come up with the best definition we could. We moved on from there, never actually coming up with one.

So before I try launching into a analytical blog post about it, I'll turn the question to you:

How do you define beauty?

Spirited

October 14

Today I ran into a former co-worker from my old lab. As we were standing there in the hallway, catching up on life, he asked how I was doing then commented, "You look good. There's spirit in your eyes." It made me smile and then it made me think. I know what he meant, but what was that source of the look on my face. Did he just see spirit in my eyes or the Spirit in my eyes? That conversation made me resolve to be filled with the Spirit this week, not just spirit.

The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you are spirit and they are life. (John 6:63) May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. (Romans 15:13)

Some really beautiful pictures

Now these, I don't think you can argue with... beautiful.

Top: Haley
Bottom: Bobby

I got to see my cousins (the adorable 1 year old twins shown above) and aunt and uncle yesterday while they were back in Indiana for a visit.
Love love love these kids.

Quote of the day

Beth, asking about my claim that I had beautiful pictures of cells from my experiments last week:

"Are they inherently beautiful or just scientifically beautiful?"

Answer: To most people probably the latter, but I think there's beauty in living, growing, healthy cells.



Baby hamster kidney cells--alive and dead via viral infection
(these were grown via cell culture, not directly from a baby hamster)

At the end of my HTML rope

I've reached the limit of my HTML skills.

My label cloud refuses to become a cloud again, no matter how many times I redo it.

My sidebar is too cluttered for my liking but I'm tired of searching for the "padding" sections that I need to alter to change it. 

And, my description disappeared when I switched templates. 

So here it is. No time/skill for more editing, at least not until I figure out more HTML stuff. 

:)

[This is what I did instead of studying biochem. Ugh. Time to stop putting things off, back to the signal transduction.]

scientists are... interesting creatures

This email was sent to the entire biology department today:

To: [Bio Dept]

Subject: chainmail and helm for sale

Full chainmail shirt $300

Spangen helm $200

Seriously? I guess next time I need to sell my ridiculously overpriced medieval memorabilia I'll use the bio dept listserv.

Sweet deliverance

Be at rest once more, O my soul,
for the LORD has been good to you.

For you, O LORD, have delivered my
soul from death,
my eyes from tears,
my feet from stumbling,
that I may walk before the LORD
in the land of the living.

Psalm 116:7-9

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Refocusing

I'm in dire need of an attitude adjustment today...

The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom's voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete. He must become greater; I must become less.
John 3: 29-30

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Homework...

The program that makes these structures took me a ridiculous amount of time to figure out. Lo and behold, the program functions better on a Mac than a PC. This is a transcriptional activator (swirly green helices) that binds to DNA (orange) under oxidative stress. I like biochemistry, but I am not a biochemist. At least it's pretty... :)

Just for clarification...

In light of recent misconceptions of students about yeast (we use Saccharomyces cerevisiae in lab), I feel the need to educate others. Here are a few necessary basics:

Yeast is NOT bacteria.
Yeast is NOT bread.
Yeast does NOT grow into bread.
Yeast do NOT, in and of themselves, rise.


Yeast is a fungus.
Baker's yeast (S. cerevisiae) is added to bread and through its fermentation process it emits carbon dioxide gas which causes the bread to rise.
Yeast are used as a model system to study cell biology and genetics.

And now you know... :)

Scripture in Scientific Lit!

I was reading through a paper on sex-determination (all that X and Y chromosome stuff) that was assigned for one of my classes today and was pleasantly surprised to find scripture cited right within the text. A little shocked I must say. I think they use it here for the purposes of clever allusion, but still scripture IN scientific literature... that's pretty cool. Check it out:

"Since testis determination appears to be a conserved function of the mammalian Y, we would search for 1A2 sequences having homologs on the Y chromosomes of a wide range of animals. To this end, we prepared 'Noah's ark blots." Onto these genomic DNA transfers "went one pair, male and female, of [many] beasts, clean and unclean, of birds and of [many things] that crawl on the ground, two by two" (Genesis 7:8-9), including humans, great apes (e.g., chimpanzee, gorilla), Old World monkeys (e.g., rhesus monkey), New World monkeys (e.g., owl monkey), rodents, rabbits, dogs, goats, horses, and cattle."

Page et al. (1987) The sex-determining region of the human Y chromosome encodes a finger protein. Cell 51 (Dec 24): 1091-1104.
(Btw, their findings were rejected a few years later in light of a mistake they made. oops.)

For He has said...

For He [God] Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. [I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down (relax My hold on you)! [Assuredly not!]
Hebrews 13:5 (Amplified Bible)

Hannah's Prayer: The Lord remembered her

"My heart rejoices in the LORD;
in the LORD my horn is lifted high.
My mouth boasts over my enemies,
for I delight in your deliverance.

"There is no one holy like the LORD;
there is no one besides you;
there is no Rock like our God.

"Do not keep talking so proudly
or let your mouth speak such arrogance,
for the LORD is a God who knows,
and by him deeds are weighed.

"The bows of the warriors are broken,
but those who stumbled are armed with strength.

Those who were full hire themselves out for food,
but those who were hungry hunger no more.
She who was barren has borne seven children,
but she who has had many sons pines away.

"The LORD brings death and makes alive;
he brings down to the grave and raises up.

The LORD sends poverty and wealth;
he humbles and he exalts.

He raises the poor from the dust
and lifts the needy from the ash heap;
he seats them with princes
and has them inherit a throne of honor.
"For the foundations of the earth are the LORD's;
upon them he has set the world.

He will guard the feet of his saints,
but the wicked will be silenced in darkness.
"It is not by strength that one prevails;

those who oppose the LORD will be shattered.
He will thunder against them from heaven;
the LORD will judge the ends of the earth.
"He will give strength to his king
and exalt the horn of his anointed."

1 Samuel 2:1-10

Moses' Song: Who is like You?

"The enemy boasted,
'I will pursue, I will overtake them.
I will divide the spoils;
I will gorge myself on them.
I will draw my sword
and my hand will destroy them.'

But you blew with your breath,
and the sea covered them.
They sank like lead
in the mighty waters.

"Who among the gods is like you, O LORD ?
Who is like you—
majestic in holiness,
awesome in glory,
working wonders?

You stretched out your right hand
and the earth swallowed them.

"In your unfailing love you will lead
the people you have redeemed.
In your strength you will guide them
to your holy dwelling.
Exodus 15: 9-13

Mycology is better than yours

This may be science-geek overload, but I can't resist. My former PI forwarded this time lapse fungi video to me and it is pretty cool (although the slime mold part kind of grosses me out a little). Check it out.

Orientation in a nutshell

Orientation is over! (Well, aside from one more meeting Sunday afternoon.) What a loooooong week. Here are the highlights:

1. Research
I have my first lab rotation set up and I'll begin that on Tuesday in the Hardy lab. I'm really excited about it. For the first few weeks I'll be doing some odds and ends because the post doc that I'll mainly be learning from is out of town. Then looking at viral pathogenesis using fruit flies. The virus (Sindbis) the Hardy lab works with is transmitted by mosquitoes and the natural reservoir is birds. Occasionally it gets transmitted to horses or humans when the mosquitoes decide to feed on something else. A mild form of disease presents itself as polyarthritis and fever while the more serious form causes encephalitis. The interesting thing is that the virus causes disease in large mammals and birds (infected cells go through apoptosis) but the mosquitoes are not affected (no apoptosis in infected cells). The difference is the host, not the virus. So what viral factors are inhibiting apoptotic pathway in mosquitoes and/or what host factors in the apoptotic pathway are the object of this inhibition? That's what I'll be working on. My second rotation is set up as well, so all systems are go on the research front.

2. AI
A good portion of the week has also been spent going through AI training (some of which has been helpful, and some not). I'm really excited now about teaching my class. I'm going to be teaching the Introductory Biology Lab. It's going to take a large amount of time, but I think it will be fun. I'll have a lot of freedom and control over the way I handle my class which will be nice. The professor who is in charge of all the intro labs just set up our oncourse pages and now I have a roster. How weird is that?! I was taking this class 4 years ago and now I have a roster of students who I'll be teaching. Crazy.

3. New friends
Last but not least I've met a lot of new people who I'll be spending a fair amount of time with. I like them so far, and I look forward getting to know them better!

Grad school orientation: Quote of the day II

"Megan! You're here! Great! You can be the other homologue!"
-Mimi (my former PI), recruiting me to be a chromosome in her meiosis presentation

Grad school orientation: Quote of the day

"Common sense in our society is decreasing unfortunately. Now they have those warning tags that remind you not to use your hair dryer in the shower. If you're dumb enough to try that, you really shouldn't be here anyway. I'm all for removing the warnings, thin out the herd."
-A medical doctor, discussing common sense in the real world and laboratory first aid with us today


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Book Review: The Language of God

I finally finished "The Language of God: A Scientist Presents Evidence for Belief" by Francis S. Collins. I was really anxious to read this book... there's a chapter entitled 'Life on Earth: Of Microbes and Man' --right up my alley. :) Collins was the head scientist working on the Human Genome Project. Through the HGP (working draft completed in 2000, and final in 2003), scientists now have access to the instruction manual to the human body. Your genome contains every bit of DNA you have: genes, non-coding regions, and regulatory sequences; it's all there, the instructions that make your body run. But not only is Collins a scientist, he is a Christian.

Collins opens and closes the book with his testimony. He begins by briefly explaining his journey from atheism to belief in God. The last chapter (and possibly my favorite) focuses on how he progressed from belief in God to embracing Christ as Savior. In between Collins contemplates how faith in God and faith in science can harmoniously exist in one person without compromising either. He spends much of the book looking at scientific evidence for creation of the universe, possibility of miraculous events that surpass the laws of nature, and evolution of living things on earth. This doesn't surprise me at all considering that this seems to be where most scientists balk when considering belief in a supernatural being. Collins pulls information from Scripture (obviously), prominent believers from St. Augustine to CS Lewis, and scientists from Galileo to Newton. He presents his evidence well and in a manner that is reader-friendly to those without a scientific background. He is writing to scientists and believers alike, asking them to pause their protests long enough to listen to what the other side has to say before claiming irreconcilable differences.

One point that is quite necessarily made is that science can only go so far. Collins calls on Stephen Jay Gould's words for this one:

To say it for all my colleagues and for the umteenth millionth time: Science simply cannot by its legitimate methods adjudicate the issue of God's possible superintendence of nature. We neither affirm it nor deny it; we simply can't comment on it as scientists.

You tell 'em, Stephen. Take that, Richard Dawkins. Science has limits (1). It cannot test the existence of God or His role in creation. Therefore, you cannot legitimately say that evolution demands atheism, as Dawkins so prominently does. Science only goes so far before faith must step in, and rightly so.

I must admit that my thoughts on the relationship between God and evolution are muddy to say the least. I have been a Christian several years longer than I have been a scientist. But what I have found as a scientist has only strengthened my faith and trust in God. I study God's creation and see firsthand the intricacies of nature, but again, science can only go so far. I can look at all the data I want, but really my faith in God comes from the way I've seen Him work in my life. It's that kind of observation that shows me the God I worship, not scientific experimentation. I am not the same person I was 10 years ago when I accepted Christ. Obviously part of that stemming from the huge difference between 12 and 22, but there is a BIG difference in how I view the world, the way I treat others around me, and what I view as important that has nothing to do with my age. These things can only be explained by Christ's work on my heart. I won't delve further into it now, but if you have questions feel free to ask.

I have other thoughts on the book, but I won't bore you with them. If you want to discuss though, I'd be happy to. I would suggest reading it, but keep in mind that this is one guy's thoughts. Make your own decisions. I'll leave you with this quote from Collins:

Science cannot be used to justify discounting the great monotheistic religions of the world, which rest upon centuries of history, moral philosophy, and the powerful evidence provided by human altruism. It is the height of scientific hubris to claim otherwise. But that leaves us with a challenge: if the existence of God is true (not just tradition, but actually true), and if certain scientific conclusions about the natural world are also true (not just in fashion, but objectively true), then they cannot contradict each other. A fully harmonious synthesis must be possible.

[(1) In order for something to be tested scientifically there must be: a hypothesis, an experiment to test the hypothesis, and the experiment must be repeatable for the data to be considered reliable. The hypothesis must be able to be falsified. In general, a hypothesis can be rejected or supported by the results, not proven. More info on the scientific method here.]

Playing with colors

Inspired by Sarah's new blog style update and savvy html skills, I decided to play around with my colors this morning. I really only changed the background color. The lime-ish green that was on there before was a little much for me to look at first thing in the morning... almost needed to break out the sunglasses. (Needless to say, not a morning person) I settled on this khaki color after playing with it for a few minutes... I can't decide if I like it or not. Does it look like I'm joining the army? Give me your two cents? Suggestions are welcome... especially if you've got the hex code too. :)

Sidenote: the current background color is called "gangrene". I'm amused and disgusted all at the same time.

EDIT: I ditched "gangrene" and I'm going with "seaweed roll". Need to revamp the label cloud colors too.

3/4, not too shabby

When I was applying to grad schools in the spring, I sent my application to 4 schools. After getting my acceptance to IU in February, I kind of put the others on the back burner in my mind. Months came and went and I received another acceptance and a rejection, completely forgetting about the 4th and final school. On Saturday (Aug 16th) I received my last letter of acceptance from Rutgers in NJ. Seriously? Aug 16th? I'm beginning grad school on the 25th and they're just now sending out their acceptance letters?! Not only have people already accepted offers, but roommates have been picked and apartments have been leased. I thought it might have been stuck in the mail, but the postmark said Aug 13. I think they may need to revamp their application deadline and process.

Anyway, it made me laugh. I'm still completely confident that IU is where I'm supposed to be. Sorry, Rutgers.

Seriously?

Good job, Olympic officials. Way to ruin two little girls' self esteem before they even reach double digits:

Not cute enough for the Olympics


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Dear God, Thank you for butterflies and dolphins...

It's Sunday morning in the 4 & 5 year old room and we're getting ready for snack time. Abby, a sweet little girl with blond hair and blue eyes, volunteers to say grace:

"Dear God, Thank you for the butterflies and thank you for the dolphins and uh...thank you for grace. Amen."

I loved this prayer. How precious. Abby thanked God for butterflies and dolphins. Why? Because they make her happy. She sees these creatures and she smiles and laughs. It makes sense to thank the Giver of these gifts. I've told probably half a dozen people this story and even went as far as to put it on my favorite quotes because I enjoyed it so much, but it took on even more meaning after Doug's talk at Connexion Sunday night.

Doug spoke about joy, using Scripture from Philippians 3. One of the points involved the joyful nature of God. I have to admit that I don't often think of Him that way. I think of Him as experiencing happiness, but I guess I leave out the aspects of wonder, excitement, and surprise that I often find in joy. Doug described it as God making one daisy and then being so overjoyed with it that he just kept making them... why only have one daisy when you can have many? Or God making one blade of grass and then continuing to create blades of grass because he was delighted by the color green. I love this illustration of God's delight in His own creation and it sent me back to Genesis:

And God said, "Let there be light," and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and he separated light from the darkness. (1:3-4)

The land produced vegetation: plants bearing seed according to their own kinds and trees bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. (1:12)

God made the wild animals according to their kinds, the livestock according to their kinds, and all the creatures that move along the ground according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. (1:25)

God saw all that he had made and it was very good. (1:31)

I could keep going, those are just a few examples. The phrase "And God saw that it was good" took on new meaning for me. I don't think God is just seeing the practicality and productivity of His creation. I think He's really filled with joy over it. He is delighting in it, like a painter gazing at the portrait he just finished, admiring his work and feeling wonder and excitement over what has been made by his hands. What a beautiful characteristic of God to think on. I thought about that this morning as I walked to work. I made sure to take notice of the sun and the trees and the robins that were hopping around trying to catch worms for their breakfast. Just knowing that God delights in His creation made it so much more meaningful to me today. It's like your best friend's birthday party when they get a really cool toy and are excited to share it with you. Their delight becomes your delight. God's joy becomes our joy.

Today's thought process

I was thinking
over thinking
cause there's just too many scenarios
to analyze
"Over Thinking" -Relient K

Out of mind, out of state.
Trying to keep my head on straight.
"Pressing On" -Relient K

Cause it seems I get so hung up on
The history of what's gone wrong
And the hope of a new day
Is sometimes hard to see
And though I'm finally catching onto it
And now the past is just a conduit
And the light there at the end is
Where I'll be
"Up and Up" -Relient K

Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
Matthew 6:27

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Matthew 6:33-34

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
Philippians 4:8

Happy Birthday!

Bobby and Haley turned 1 year old last week! So hard to believe--they're growing so fast! I miss them and wish I was there. Anyone want to go to NJ today? haha. :)

Down in my heart to stay

Despite all of the hustle and bustle of moving, this week has truly been joy-filled. The fellowship has been wonderful. Between lunches, planning meetings, emails, and Bible study, each day has left me smiling, laughing, and delighting in the blessings God has given me in friends. Seriously...right now, smile on my face. Can't make it stop. :)

Joyful, joyful, we adore Thee
God of glory, Lord of love
Hearts unfold like flowers before Thee
Opening to the sun above

My Father's house

The packing and moving is finally over! I'm so thankful to be living in one place as opposed to two right now. Also, the living room and kitchen are quite a bit bigger than what I remember, so I'm looking forward to inviting friends over soon. :) Despite the fact that this is my new home, it doesn't feel like it yet. I was completely expecting to wake up in the middle of the night and wonder where I was, but I was so tired that I slept straight through. Moving and reorienting the word "home" to fit this place has made me think about my true home--where I really belong: heaven.

But in keeping with his promise we are looking forward to a new heaven and a new earth, the home of righteousness. 2 Peter 3:13

In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. John 14:2-3

I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." Revelation 21:2-4

These are amazing promises and I am so glad that I get to participate in them. Everyday I'm a little closer to it. As I go through day to day life and seek Christ more consistently, it becomes blatantly obvious that I don't belong here--that this earth is not my true home. I've noticed this not only in my own experience, but also by looking at what is going on in this world. My heart hurts a little every time I read a headline about war, genocide, abuse, the list goes on and on. This isn't how it's supposed to be, and one day God will fix all that.

Although, to be honest, sometimes it scares me. Maybe 'scare' is the wrong word... it makes me anxious. I think it's just the fear of the unknown that gives me a little pause and the uncertainty about what heaven is really going to be like. I know that God is true to His word and that he will do what he says he will do, so I have to keep handing that anxiousness back over and trusting Him. Much easier said than done.

But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body. Philippians 3:20-21

The highs and lows of 202

We're moving in one week. Just across town to a new apartment, but still a move. I was thinking this week about things I will and won't miss about this house... here are a few.

I won't miss:
-ancient appliances that shake in the spin cycle and bake unevenly.
-the air conditioning vent located directly beneath my desk (pull on the parka to check your email!)
-the ridiculously old carpet and linoleum
-the sketchy locks on the front and back door... not likely to keep you out if you really want in

I will miss:
-living with Sara :(
-the front and back porches, especially in the summer
-our striped wall:
-my aquamint-colored room
-our rooms all being connected so that we can talk between them
-Sara's big comfy chair in the living room
-the huge (by college student standards) kitchen
-all the storage space
-having our own washer and dryer
-not having neighbors in the same building
-a big space giving us the ability to invite lots of people over

I've really enjoyed this house and living with both Sara and Kendal and we had a lot of great memories in this house, but time to move on. :) Kendal and I will head to the south side to an apartment in just one week.

A lesson from Daniel

This post is late in coming as usual. These were verses that spoke to me in a situation a couple months ago, but truth is truth, right? It still applies.

Background: I was always one of the "smart" kids in HS, so coming to IU was a pretty humbling experience for me. There are a lot of really intelligent people here and a lot of them are a lot smarter than me. I thought I had finally become accustomed to my own level of intelligence and talent last semester, but there were still discouraging moments. One in particular comes to mind. Science is all about questions--continuous questions. So in my upper-level classes, I was pretty happy if I was able to 1. understand the material, and 2. process through it enough to come up with questions about it. However, there was this one girl in one of my classes who asked these insane questions. The kind that make you gawk at her in awe and say 'man, where did that come from?! i wish i had thought of that.' She was always a mile ahead of the rest of us. While we were still processing through the material, she was onto thinking about the next issue or implication. Instead of being encouraged by her questions, I was completely discouraged. I fell into the whole self-deprecating, she's-so-much-smarter-than-me act. Pity party.

One of the next few nights, I picked up my Bible and randomly started to read Daniel. (I love it when I choose a passage to read without intention and God speaks to me through it!!) In my friend Christina's words: Daniel was a studmuffin. That's right. He had it going on. He was handsome, smart, well informed, quick to learn, and able to take on the responsibility given to him (1:4-5). God gave him knowledge and understanding (1:17). Now the big difference (among many others!) between Daniel and I: he took his knowledge and understanding, realized where it came from, and instead of comparing himself to others, he praised God for it. He was humble and pointed out the fact that without God he could not have interpreted the king's dream--the knowledge and understanding were not his own to claim and they would serve God's purpose. I just keep going back to the verses below.

Daniel replied, "No wise man, enchanter, magician, or diviner can explain to the king the mystery he has asked about, but there is a God in heaven who reveals mysteries. (2:27-28)

As for me, this mystery has been revealed to me, not because I have greater wisdom than other living men, but so that you, O king, may know the interpretation and that you may understand what went through your mind. (2: 30)

Teach me some melodious sonnet

Pieces of songs I have been humming/singing around the house this evening. Such beauty in the words and melodies.

Father, let me dedicate all this life to Thee
In whatever worldly state Thou would have me be
Not from sorrow, pain, or care, freedom dare I claim
This alone will be my prayer: Glorify Thy Name


In Christ alone, my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My comforter, My all in all
Here in the love of Christ I stand


He brings peace into our madness
And comfort in our sadness
This is our God
This is our God
This is the One we have waited for
This is the One we have waited for
This is the One we have waited for
This is our God

Harrison Ford makes me want to major in archaeology

Lost in the words

People become fascinated with pictures and words, and wind up forgetting the Language of the World. --The Alchemist (Coelho)

So true. I count myself one of them. I've been thinking lately about how often my nose is stuck in a book or my eyes are behind a camera lens. It's true that pictures and words have their merits: knowledge, creativity, emotion. But am I missing out on living because I'm trying to capture the perfect Kodak moment? Am I ignoring the wisdom that comes through experience by living others' lives vicariously through books? I wouldn't take it that far--at least not for myself, but it is good, I think, to keep myself in check. So that I remember to lay down the books and camera and just enjoy living in the moment. Ironically, I haven't been able to get my camera to work for the last month or so. :)

Didn't have my camera by my side this time
Hoping I would see the world through both my eyes
--"3x5" (John Mayer)

My hobbies? Ummm...

I was asked a few days ago what my hobbies are. I sat there and racked my brain, eventually coming up with an answer although I had not participated in said hobby for quite some time. I came home and asked my roommate, who knows me about as well as I do, what my hobbies were. She paused and looked at me strangely... "Uhhhh... I don't know..." After considering it for a few more minutes, we came to the conclusion that I do not have hobbies... at least not in the traditional definition of a hobby.

Everything I enjoy doing somehow involves science, God, my friends, and nature--all of which could also be classified under school/work, church activities, and just spending time with friends. I don't think most people classify school/work/church as hobbies. My definition of hobbies: things that I enjoy doing that are not obligations. Granted school and work are both obligations, but I really enjoy my job which is centered around science and Kendal and I have sciencey conversations all the time at home (recent topics have been craniofacial duplication and how the rabies vaccine works.) I have now come to the conclusion that my main hobby is getting to know people, which honestly seems kind of strange since I tend to think of myself as more as an introvert than an extrovert. Whenever I have spare time, I'm usually spending it with a friend in some way, shape, or form. Given the choice (and pleasant weather), I would prefer spending that time outside--so I guess that's where the nature part comes in. If I can spend some time with a person, we have a good conversation, a few laughs, I learn something about you, you learn something about me--then I'm a pretty satisfied person :)

That said, just to give you an idea of hobbies that I have enjoyed in the past, but don't necessarily do on a regular basis: playing the alto sax, swing dancing, showing sheep, gardening, spending time outside (doesn't happen as often as I would like).

Where I come from

Sisters in Christ

What a blessing! I don't have any biological sisters, so that makes my sisters in Christ that much more precious to me. Their laughter and joy bring happiness to those around them. Praise to God for welcoming hearts, beautiful spirits, and the building of friendships. Their encouragement and support are vital during this walk through life. Praise, glory and honor to God.

God's Glory, Part 2

I've been thinking about this entry for awhile now. It is the continuation of the post on the glory of God from a few weeks ago and was actually meant to come immediately after it. I've been putting it off because I couldn't completely wrap my head around it--still can't. That seems kind of obvious since it is about God's glory which is more than my simple, human mind can understand. I guess it's different in the fact that as I sit here typing, I don't really know exactly where the next few paragraphs are going to go. This may end up being more of a stream of consciousness kind of post.

In the last entry I talked about seeing God's glory in the world around me. This time I want to start with a verse:

So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. --1 Corinthians 10:31

This was causing me some trouble yesterday. I was at the lab working and did not want to be there. I had forgotten my allergy meds so I had a headache and as a result was not a happy camper. Bad attitude. During the morning I listened to one of Dan's old sermons from last semester when he was talking about the solas of the reformation. This particular sermon was on Soli Deo gloria, glory to God alone. After listening to this sermon and some worship music, my attitude improved quite a bit, although I still don't think I was really thinking about doing my work for the glory of God. I didn't even have a good idea about what that should look like really. After contemplating it for awhile, here are a few ideas that I think relate to doing everything for the glory of God.

1. Avoid sin. When you do fall, repent, get back up and keep going.
Obvious, right? But one thing I hadn't really thought about is what makes sin, sin. One of things that Dan mentioned in that sermon was that when we sin we are doing the opposite of giving God glory. Sin drives a wedge in between us and God. We're not giving God glory; we're turning our backs and running away from Him. In John 8: 34, Jesus says "I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave to sin." In Matthew 6:24, Jesus explains that a man cannot serve two masters. So it's up to you which to serve, God or sin.

2. Do everything to the best of your ability.
I had the privilege of growing up in a home where my best was what my parents required of me. They knew I wasn't perfect, but as long as I did my best they were happy. God expects that too. It doesn't matter if I'm at the lab or doing the dishes at home, I should always be doing my best. Laziness in whatever I do should not be tolerated. It results in me becoming selfish and not using my gifts and abilities to glorify God. It's like planting your talent instead of using it to further the kingdom (Matthew 25).

3. Be a good representative of your faith and your God.
Remember in elementary school when you would go on field trips and the teacher would remind the class that you were representing the school and her classroom, so you'd better behave? It's the same sort of thing. We are ambassadors to the world through God. We are in charge of delivering God's message to all people. First of all, we wouldn't be effective in doing that if we weren't good representatives of God (leading back to #2). Second, others should see God working through us. That brings glory to God. Psalm 66 says:

All the earth bows down to you;
they sing praise to you,
they sing praise to your name."
Selah

Come and see what God has done,
how awesome his works in man's behalf!

Those are a few things that I think result in giving God glory in all we do. I fail at all of them, but I am aware of them and try to follow. God is working in me and it is so evident when I look at my life through the past year. Glory to God in the highest. God of all creation. Lord Almighty. King of Glory